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Release and Receive
Pamela Zimmer 
Pamela Zimmer
Human Relations Center for Women
Do you feel that you don't always get the respect you believe you deserve in your relationships? Do you feel that you're truly not being valued for who you are or what you actually contribute to your partnership? Do you simply feel that you're being patronized at times by your guy, as if you are a child, and he wants to make sure you're treated accordingly?
I don't know any women, personally or professionally, including myself, that can't answer in the affirmative to these questions. In other words, we all have felt underrated, devalued, and disrespected at times.
But why is this so common? Do we really want to feel bad as a result of the words or actions of someone else? Not likely unless you're just masochistic and you're seeking ill treatment to justify how bad you feel about yourself.
Well, although this may be the case on those rare occasions when we're feeling "down and dirty," it most often isn't. So what is the reason that someone you care about or like or even love can come at you from "out of the blue" with a critical or destructive comment?
And what's more, why do we then have to feel like that single remark replaced the sun with dark clouds and ruined our day? As women, we usually feel either a combo of hurtful pain along with what feels like uncontrollable rage percolating just below the surface, or even deeper than that, or we swing back and forth between these polarities.
So we either want to sit in a dark room and cry having our own private pity party, or we want to lash out at the party who offended us, or vent about that person to anyone who will listen, and hopefully care.
When it comes right down to it, we need to release emotionally the toxic energy we just ingested through what was imposed on us by another. The emotional release is extremely important for your health and wellbeing. However, it's only truly effective if you manage to "let go" of all that you're holding on to which is poisoning your system.
Otherwise, you're left with the residue which can spring up again if you don't clear it completely. Well, first, I want to say that you must be in a safe place when you go on your releasing binge. I strongly recommend that you're alone when you do it, because although you may feel like being vengeful, release is not about harming yourself or someone else.
It is about restoring you to a better place, where you can find some sense of wellbeing within. It is here that you will discover the truth about what you had experienced at the receiving end of another.
In this renewed state of calmness following the storm, insights will come to you. You will begin to see that although you were his target, you are not the victim. He was projecting his own feelings of lowness and inadequacy onto you. He needed someone to blame and you were there so it was all too convenient.
While this form of projection is certainly not okay, you have now come to realize that his hurtful words were all about HIM. This one's not about you!
In Loving Light,
Dr. Pamela
Dr. Pamela Zimmer founded the Human Relations Center for Women in New York in 1989. In her Center, she serves women as a Psychospiritual Therapist. Basically that means that she helps women to become integrated within themselves spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. She empowers women by guiding them and counseling them through their process of connecting with their true selves and actualizing their full potential.
Dr. Pamela works to help women evolve into their highest selves and attain their potential in all areas of their lives.
To gain insight into your journey to your Higher Self, check out her blog site:
http://growinghealthyrelationships.com/
Article submitted Thursday, October 09, 2008
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